Monday, November 24, 2008

Bigger than Jesus

The Vatican has posthumously pardoned John Lennon.

It turns out, after all these years, The Beatles really *are* bigger than Jesus:

"
The fact remains that 38 years after breaking up, the songs of the Lennon-McCartney brand have shown an extraordinary resistance to the passage of time, becoming a source of inspiration for more than one generation of pop musicians..."

Also bigger than Jesus, Miley Cyrus and recently, Barack Obama.

So. On my list of "mortal sins" which the Vatican has committed, I can cross off:
-Denying the Holocaust
-Excommunicating Lennon

Okay Papa. You're off the cyber-dead list and onto life-support.
Let's hear an apology for those few centuries of minor Inquisitions, an open acknowledgement that men of the cloth sometimes favor little children in place of celibacy and I'll consider redeeming the Holy Empire entirely.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Techno and Technology Tabs

It's a Tuesday schedule on a Monday. I can't advise the college-bound because there's not enough money in this week to afford two days of duty and a key workshop on financial aid.


I'm not in the mood to focus on GRE preparations, so I shoot for Onion. DENIED. Gawker. DENIED. Slate is accessible, but Web Nannies are cyber-dead to me now. The technology that scans Websites for the f word and other non-educational macros is obnoxious. I understand why we can't access the my/face in school, but seriously, The Onion? That's America's finest news source.
Also black-listed is Toothpaste for dinner. Fortunately, Married to the Sea isn't yet popular enough among Miami high schoolers to warrant an X-STOP, but that don' mean it's not on its way.

Additionally, the students in this computer science class are way too into house. I'm not f-d up enough to appreciate the genre's subtleties (is there no sweeter sound than a throbbing siren?), and I'm pretty sure they're not either, so I plug in head phones to avoid a confrontational muzak war. House/techno, you're dead to me too.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

We like your candy, but not your politics

Halloween.
The homeowner in the McMansion with the McPalin signs in his yard is passing out saucer sized lollies that run about $10 a pop. Buying votes.

A family crosses the street to our 1948 run-down home featuring 3 CHANGE signs, one for each vote in the household.
"we like your candy [fun-size kit-kats, york peppermint patties and butterfinger crisps] but not your politics," the mother sneers.

So I reach into her kids' sacks of treats and pull out handfuls of candy.
Redistribute the wealth.